selfconcept: (Default)
hien callias, world eater ([personal profile] selfconcept) wrote2025-11-13 07:51 pm

purgastory >> inbox

HELLO



"..."

GOODBYE


TEXT | VIDEO | VOICE | ACTION
aerodynamic: (Taking all the blame)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-09 08:18 pm (UTC)(link)
[ make yosuke a liar, i dare you. ]

Because it's one of the most important ones to you. What kind of a sacrifice would it be if it was something you had plenty of? [ he just says this, and he kind of flinches a little because redstring, hien, your headache is becoming his headache, but it's fine. he can deal.

in a weird way, he's oddly fascinated watching him break down because it's so unusual, but it does prove that nobody's invincible. the anxiety isn't completely gone, but he's still taking time to ease him off the ledge and hopefully help somehow. it's why he pauses... and then decides to explain. ]


... it took Takehaya Susano-o from me. [ which should have also been physically impossible since the persona is yosuke, a large part of him. ] It took about a week for it to come back, but I... it felt empty the whole time. Like a huge piece of me was gone.

[ since. well. it was. he is only saying this to say he kind of knows how it feels to be extremely anxious and insane about something that's such an integral part of you to have it suddenly disappear and signify a huge change you don't want. for hien, it's the difference between being himself and a monster. for yosuke, it's the difference between who he was and who he is now. ]
aerodynamic: (Under forgotten houses)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-09 08:30 pm (UTC)(link)
[ NO!!!

double NO!!! yosuke is trying but to be fair he's not always the best, so he says that and hien just kind of falls over and yosuke immediately panics. ]


H-hey! [ AH. NO. HOW DOES HE FIX THIS. he's kind of letting his hands hover like he's not sure what to do before realizing that there's some fucky thing happening in the maze that's doing a new feedback loop, so he's quickly re-prioritizing to calm himself down so they aren't in a double panic loop. ]

... [ maybe he needs to just shut up for a second and wait it out. restrategize. all of that. ]
aerodynamic: (Pursuing my true self)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-09 10:23 pm (UTC)(link)
[ oh, buddy... he truly hates the sensation sharing half because it feels weird and half because he doesn't actually like knowing hien feels this way. or that he's trying to forcibly chill and struggling about it. ]

Yeah. I'm still here. [ he doesn't quite touch him again, but he hovers close and seems to actively be focusing on deep breaths and trying to clear his head. he doesn't understand how red string works but he's trying. ] What can I do to help you?
aerodynamic: (In the stream of tears)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-10 12:41 am (UTC)(link)
[ he's doing better than yosuke whose response to being hugged by yu while crying was "you dumbass, that's for girls." he's matured since then, and even if he's still not always good with knowing how to give physical affection he does at least know hugs have made him feel better (to his chagrin) and hien is clearly losing a battle here. what the hell is he worried about yosuke for?

so what this means is he kind of looks at him for a few seconds before he concedes. it's a little awkward at first like he's not sure if this is correct, but after a few seconds he actually pulls him closer. do as you wish. ]
aerodynamic: (Take your losses in your stride)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-10 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
[ that pretty much makes it less awkward immediately, because hien's busy practically clinging to him and he'd have to be an absolute asshole to ignore that. he doesn't push him off or anything, and he doesn't complain about the hands gripping tight or the warmth of hien's face in his shoulder even if he's mildly worried he's a little too bony to be that comfortable.

instead, he's adjusting his arms to hold him tighter and sort of lets himself think before one of his hands comes up to stroke the back of his hair. that seems right? a slow, repetitive motion to try and calm him down.

there are plenty of other people who are probably better than this, and he's a little sorry this is what hien gets when he can't entirely measure up to what he might need, but he's at least doing his best because he's done his best for yosuke. it's only right. so basically he really can stay all he wants while he falls apart a little and can't quite crawl out of this pit, yosuke's going to keep hugging him until he decides he wants to pull away. ]
aerodynamic: (Turning misery into meaningfulness)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-10 04:51 pm (UTC)(link)
[ hien your expectations.... well. guess yosuke just lives here now because if hien's not pulling away he's not pushing the guy off? he's getting some comfort out of this and to be honest, yosuke is just glad he's able to offer that much to him. he'll continue with the hand smoothing over his hair idly and lean back a little to be more comfortable but otherwise he remains solid and secure.

even if that sentence gets a tiny laugh from him. ]


At least I'm good for something. [ it's a joke, but he is a little concerned. ] Are you cold right now? We can go inside if you want. But I'm okay with this, too. [ maybe the river also took hien's body warmth, he doesn't know. he also isn't really pushing for them to go back yet because sometimes you need to just be away for a bit while you're freaking out. relatable content. ]
aerodynamic: (Something stuck in your gut)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-10 09:59 pm (UTC)(link)
[ he can be a cat, fine by him. me as cats as well. but he's only mildly surprised by that statement and he's not sure what to say, so there's a brief hum of acknowledgement. ]

... thanks. [ this isn't about him though, so he can ruminate on that later. ] I know it's not the same, what you're going through right now and what happened last week. But I want to help you however I can.

[ whatever that may look like. ]
aerodynamic: (You gotta play by the rules)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-11 03:41 am (UTC)(link)
[ there's a brief little chill, like the kind that settles over you when you don't actually want someone to pull away but you get used to it. ]

... I'm glad you let me be here. [ stuff weighs on everyone differently. ]
aerodynamic: (It's a war out there everyday)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-11 07:21 pm (UTC)(link)
--ack! [ listen here, yes, he is stupid and he does like affection selectively, as it turns out, but this doesn't mean the sudden resumption of cuddling doesn't surprise him. ]

Okay, okay, jeez. I get it. [ ... allows this anyway and immediately feels content with it. idiot. ]

I'm sorry. I should've told you about the river before.
aerodynamic: (You're locked up in your mind)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-11 07:36 pm (UTC)(link)
[ good. all this is teaching yosuke is that cuddling is the answer to making him feel better, actually. ]

Should I be more worried about you spite-eating stuff in the future?
aerodynamic: (Who assesses rules that assassinate us)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-11 09:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Dude. [ just a snort. then again, his best friend tends to eat shit he probably shouldn't so you know. ] Not even gonna pretend? Well, I guess that's okay. Just another part of who you are.
aerodynamic: (Take your losses in your stride)

[personal profile] aerodynamic 2025-12-11 10:00 pm (UTC)(link)
And the thing I do like most about you is that you're yourself, so what am I complaining for? [ haha. but he reaches up to kind of pet over his scalp like you would a dog. ]

But anytime.